Steven's Story

“I enlisted in the Royal Highland Fusiliers in 2006 when I was 21. I was a chef and was looking for a fresh challenge, and that’s when I decided to join the Infantry, so I signed up.

“After a few years, I served in Afghanistan on Op Herrick in 2008 from April until the end of October, with only 10 days home leave.

“When we got back to Scotland after the tour, a couple of the boys noticed changes in me. I was experiencing depression and felt I didn’t deserve to feel this way as I’d only been on one tour, there were so many others who had been on more than me.

“I felt I could never switch off, I was always ‘at the ready’, I was always watchful; in Afghan there are people walking about all the time with rifles, you have to be on your guard all the time. 

“In 2010 I left the Army because of my PTSD. Over the next few years, my mental health didn’t improve.

“Things which were important to some people - like having the latest phone - just weren’t important to me, I felt disconnected to things like that, it didn’t feel real after what I’d seen. 

“Around 2014/2015, I was struggling to get to see my children, I was in homeless accommodation, I was isolating and drinking heavily and felt suicidal. Eventually I got in contact with The Royal British Legion because I was struggling and asked for help and they pointed me to Combat Stress. 

“Combat Stress has helped me so much; I’m now happily married, I’m on a good path, my moods no longer swing wildly. The treatment I’ve received has been second to none, it’s been amazing.

“I’m back in employment, I know my worth, I have a great job and more responsibility. For years I didn’t want to cook, but I’m back doing the job I love and really am enjoying it. I’ve had my “wobbles” as I call them, but I’ve learned to be honest about my demons, and my employer has been very supportive which has helped. 

“When the humanitarian crisis unfolded in Afghanistan last August, I did find it difficult. We lost people when I was on tour there, I remember them. All the good stuff we did out there, building dams and schools, it now feels abandoned. All the locals we worked with, we all got familiar with them, and then watching the news and seeing what’s happened recently, it makes you feel ill.

“Before I would have been back to square one when this happened, but with the help of Combat Stress I now know that’s not the case, I can deal with it.

“There’s no one thing that Combat Stress has helped with, it’s the whole package. They have given me the confidence to carry on. They also helped my wife; she could only carry so much herself but with their help she understands my PTSD triggers and has her tools to help me.

“It’s taken me the best part of six years to feel I was worthy of support; I can’t imagine how others who were in lots of conflicts must feel. To any veteran who is thinking about calling, I’d say just do it, you deserve the help. The people at Combat Stress are amazing, they want to know you to help you.

“Combat Stress is one of the most worthwhile charities for veterans, they know veterans, they understand, and they listen. They’re not trying to ‘pigeonhole’ you and they know each veterans’ experience is unique. The hardest part is realising you deserve the help.

April 2022