Bill's Story
“Combat Stress’ staff were absolutely phenomenal - all of them.”
Bill’s time in the Army left him with Complex PTSD. For almost 30 years he locked his traumatic memories away until our specialist treatment helped him to live with them.
Bill joined the Royal Electrical and Mechanical Engineers in 1990 to escape his home life. “I’d wanted to join the Army as far back as I can remember,” he says. “I was always playing soldiers and also taking things apart. When I did the Army careers test, they said I should join the Royal Military Police, but I said no chance – I wanted to be a mechanic.”
Being a shy 17-year-old, Bill found Army life challenging at first but soon came out of his shell. He enjoyed the camaraderie with his fellow soldiers and the fact that no two days were the same.
“Nothing excited me like the Army did and it was good to belong to something different,” he says. “You always looked after each other and someone always had your back.”
In 1995 Bill was posted to Bosnia, which left traumatic memories that were hard to leave behind. When he returned home Bill’s wife realised his mental health had been affected by what he’d seen. “She noticed I was aggressive and angry; I didn’t seem to settle and it was affecting my young son too,” he says. “I didn’t think I had changed, but she spoke to my commanding officer who suggested I see a doctor.”
Bill had two months of treatment with a mental health nurse, but chose to not reveal his true feelings for fear that it might affect his career.
“I locked it all away and stopped meeting people that would talk about Bosnia,” he says. “My attitude was ‘don’t open the box’, but it just got worse and worse.”
Bill left the Army in 2012, and life continued. However, things came to a head in July 2024 when he deliberately drove fast to overtake numerous cars and nearly had a head on accident with a truck.
Bill called our Helpline and was diagnosed with Complex PTSD, before undertaking our intensive residential programme at our England South hub. However, he almost didn’t go in on the first day. “I got through the gates and thought ‘is this really for me?’” he says. “I thought I’d wait in the car park for a couple of seconds then leave, but someone came over and tapped on the window.
“He asked if I was there for the residential course, but I said I wasn’t sure it was for me. He invited me in for a cuppa but once we were inside he said: “well you’re in now, you might as well stay”. I thought cheeky bugger! But if he hadn’t taken that time to tap on the window, I’d never have faced it.
“The staff were absolutely phenomenal, all of them. Even the chef would remember our names – he wasn’t around us most of the time, but he still remembered and the whole team did that. The care they gave us all was unbelievable.”
Bill has now completed treatment, which had an immeasurable difference on his life. “It’s changed me massively,” he says. “Before, I couldn’t go into the local town on my own. I was terrified as I didn’t want to be in a crowded space where people could go behind me. The other week I went into town on my own and wandered around.
“I’m not as on edge, I’m not counting people in and out of buildings. I went to a garden centre and we stopped for a coffee. My wife asked if I was ok sitting where I was as I didn’t have my back to the wall and I hadn’t even realised - I was relaxed.
“I still get upset by things I remember but try not to internalise it – I let it come out and talk about it with my family. I can communicate better with them about what’s going on inside me and that wouldn’t have happened without Combat Stress.”
May 2025